Full Circle

October 2006

Hilton's Story

Chapter 20 Kanchipuram and Maithuna

Once more the trip took most of the day through the hot, dusty countryside. Crowded roads and many potholes meant the speed was slow, particularly as the bus detoured around bicycles and cows in the narrow streets through towns and villages.  It eventually arrived at the Royal Southern Hotel about midway between Kanchipuram and Madras or as it is known now as Chennai.

Among the holiest cities of India, Kanchipuram once hosted a thousand temples. During the third century it was a major seat of learning and a prominent Buddhist centre. Even now the many temples and tall gopurams are visible long before buses arrive in the area with the tourists flocking to visit the temples and buy hand-woven silks and saris made by the local people.

Temples are dedicated to Lord Vishnu but Tantrics are most interested in the Kailashnatha temple dedicated to Shiva and the Kamakshi Amman temple dedicated to Parvati, the goddess of love. Parvati as the wife of Shiva is Shakti in a more refined form.

Bob took them to the Shiva temple with its huge 60 metre carved gopuram and lions grimacing at the gates. It is one of the largest in the south of India, three hundred years older than the temples they had seen in Maduria.

An old guru, meditating in a small shrine dedicated to Parvati, looked up and with a smile of recognition said, “I have been waiting for you.” Bob bowed and placed alms in his begging bowl.

        Hilton helped Kay find a bench as the guru known as Upsali spoke repeating the story of Shiva and Shakti on Mount Meru. He talked about the Hindu gods and peoples search for release from the cycle of birth, death and rebirth through enlightenment. His stories were not new and the attention of some listeners drifted but Hilton was riveted by to Upsali and looked toward Kay who seemed lost in his words.

He paused and then asked the bardo question “Who are you?”

No one answered.

He waited and then explained that the answer is discovered when the mind is truly opened during the sacred ceremonies in deep meditation. He described the purpose of the four elements of fish, meat, bread and wine that are consumed in the ceremony.

“Fish”, he said, “represents the elemental stage of life, meat is the flesh of all creatures, bread is from the hearth or womb of life and wine is the lifeblood of sentient beings. Wine liberates the participants to find physical release as their souls embrace each other as Shiva and Shatki. When the ceremony becomes intense yonis and lingams engage in acts of loving abandon without regard for caste or social status. The mind is free to seek enlightenment within the circle of Tantric worship.”

Everyone gasped as Upsali described the forbidden ritual. One of the men said it sounded a lot like a cult he had heard about in Mexico. He certainly didn’t want any part of it for himself. Several others felt the same way. Later, as Bob gave thanks for the sutra he told him to a messenger would come to him that evening.

That evening Kay, Hilton, Bob and Jess joined twenty strangers at the Kamakshi temple. It was dark when the messenger brought them to the meeting place where they waited in the gloom. Upsali approached dressed in a long white robe, looking much different than he did during the day. The group followed him through a long hall to the sanctorum to the foot a large image of Parvati They formed a circle, a woman and man alternately, under torches, light flickered in shafts of red and orange. Kay on his left, a beautiful Hindu woman on his right, he observed the people in the circle were young and old, from all castes. A few were westerners.

A priest appeared chanting a prayer. The sacraments were brought into the circle by other priests and placed on low tables inside the circle. The priest took fish and ate it. He took meat and bread blessing each sacrament. Finally, in a last act he drank wine. The participants then took the sacraments. Some chanted the prayers that the priest had uttered and others settled into the lotus position to open their minds to the forces of kundalini.

Hilton found the food tasty, the wine strong and fortified with herbs or spices he couldn’t identify. He fell into a euphoric state. His vision became hazy and it seemed other people in the circle became fuzzy. He felt a hand reach into his clothing as the Hindu woman came to him. She groped for his lingam and he felt impelled to touch her, caressing her breasts as she freed him from his clothing. He drifted lazily as she took him into her beautiful mouth. He drank more of the lovely wine passed to him by Kay. She was glowing in a soft haze, a Hindu man kissing her breasts. His head fell into the lap of the lady beside him and he felt his mouth against her warm yoni. They floated together, head to tale in the “the lovemaking of the crow” described in the ancient Kama Sutra.

Kay was in the haze engulfed in soul freeing orgasms. More wine and food passed, some from mouth to mouth. People lay on the floor or wandered about the chamber chanting and ranting incoherently. The priests and the old guru gazed over the ceremony to see that no hurt came to anyone as their souls reached for enlightenment.

Hilton drifted in a shadowy world of images. Kay floated by, radiant and happy, then Karen appeared and he felt his mouth on her breast. She flashed away and he was with his wife again alive and vibrant, at the graduation of their son from college. Images from their life flashed faster and faster until he on was his wedding night exploding into a toe curling orgasm of love and pleasure. He reached to kiss her but she was gone and he was with his high school sweetheart groping on a couch in some living room. Back the images went to his mother and father at Christmas dinner. She looked so sweet his heart broke but soon he was in the darkness of the womb and then looking into the stars of the cosmos, demons, grasping, demanding to know who he was. His mind confused, images passed, one figure separated from the mist and drifted toward him. Gradually he became aware and recognized it as Kay. She floated closer, they merged and only one figure floated in the bardo world. Another demon reached demanding to know who they were. The answer came easily in unison “I am you!” The demons disappeared and peace settled over them and they gradually floated back to the temple.

Hilton opened his eyes. He was wrapped in Kay’s arms, their limbs entwined about each other. They were one and he now knew that he was she and she was he and they were one with all the people and creatures that have been, are now and will be everywhere. They clung to each other enraptured by the ecstasy of their physical bodies. He felt her orgasms as if they were his and she felt his seed course in and out of her body. Sparks of kundalini energy enveloped them and no others could touch or join them.

The ceremony continued into the early morning hours when the guru came to them chanting a prayer of release from their state of rapture. He spoke, their minds cleared, saying that they must remember the experience and relive it whenever possible, that it is a significant station on the road to full enlightenment. He said that they had seen the bardo world, had answered the question and might yet gain release from the cycle of birth, death and rebirth.

Kay nodded struggling to get up. She helped Hilton whose knees were rubbery. They dressed and walked through the long hall to the temple gate where Bob and Jess waited. Their eyes glowed with a strange light. Together they went into the early dawn light of this mysterious city.

The final days of the tour passed quickly. Their last night was in a grand hotel in Chennai. Some of the group had spent the day shopping in the city and others visited the beach along the coast. The beach is one of the most beautiful recreation areas in the south east of India. Bob asked everyone to get together after supper for a final discussion about the trip. He suggested that they might also share a group Tantric meditation as well and the idea ensured everyone attended.

Jack was the first to describe his thoughts about the trip and said that he thought the sights and temples they had seen had overwhelmed them.

“I don’t think my understanding of Tantra has expanded as much as I expected although I know more about its origins,” he said.

Others said the same thing. They would like to have experienced more of the spiritual side of Tantra. Bob asked Kay to share her experiences of the special night they had shared.

Kay talked about her pleasure being on the trip and the joy she experienced through Tantra. “The temples and sites we’ve seen were thrilling but the most intense was the Maithuna sacrament”

She described her mystical union with Hilton in the sphere of the planets, which seemed to be the world between death and birth. It was a frightening place until her spirit sensed his presence and they were able to unite. She wondered if their spirits had been together in previous lives because the attraction was so strong. They had not been able to see into the past or into the future.

When asked why she was invited and not some of the others she couldn’t explain but suggested it was because she and Hilton were in such a new relationship that their feelings were more open than for others who had been with each other for a longer time.

Bob interrupted adding that he thought Jess and himself were invited because of their intense belief in the true meaning of Tantra, a level of belief that most students don’t achieve without many years of effort and practice.

Hilton put his arms around Kay sensing the emotion in her body. The rest of the room was quiet for a few moments and then everyone began to talk. Bob restored calm suggesting it was time for private Tantric meditation with their own partners.

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